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TURBO'S SEASON REVIEW

I was kind of hoping this season review would come as a surprise (pleasant or otherwise) but that was ruined by it being advertised on the front page a week in advance.  I suppose having done one the last two years means it probably isn’t a surprise anyway.  But enough of my grievances, let’s move on with Turbo’s Season Review.  When Coxy went down with an ACL in a practice match against Manningham in which Box Hill North were convincingly beaten, you could be forgiven for thinking 2010 was going to be as bad as 2009, a year which yielded just five wins across seniors and reserves.  After seven rounds we had just one win on the board and it was looking like another wasted season.  And then something happened.  An unexpected win against Swinburne was the catalyst for a second half of the season which saw us finish with a 50% win-loss record, just one win shy of a finals berth.  Why was the second half of the season so much better than the first half?  With the influx of new players in 2010 it was clearly going to take a while for the team to gel, and this was most certainly the case.  These new guys made a massive impact both on and off the field, memorable aspects of 2010 as a result of their presence including but not limited to:

·         Berlo’s other nickname, and the reason why it was given
·         Euge’s unique bag and general take on life (not to mention his joy at finishing second on the goalkicking)
·         Stanno’s resemblance to Dame Mary Gilmore of $10 note fame
·         Scotty’s and Toby’s infamous beer bong (and differing success in evading opponents)
·         Jack’s facial fracture not hindering his attack on both the ball and (predominantly) the man
·         Brett’s ability to get sunburnt in the middle of winter
·         Davros’ dodgy hamstrings
·         Koops’ crocidile roll
·         Junior/Slippers/Noida’s various nicknames
·         Ethan’s pursuit of that elusive specky
·         Swaff’s four handballs for the season (three of them coming in the last game)

I’m sure there are plenty I’ve missed as well (e.g. Stampy and Fats), so with so many new players it’s not hard to see why it may have taken a little while for everyone to be on the same page.  Whispers around the place suggest that the vast majority will be pulling the boots on again in 2011, so let’s hope the momentum gained in the last few weeks is carried on into next year.  With any luck I will have recovered from my broken groin, ready to play my part in any future success.  Well, future success of the reserves anyway.

Until next year, this is Turbo saying “thank you, come again”.

Round 18 - Box Hill North v South Mornington

So here we are after a long season (which started in October last year for some), a much improved season, heading into the last game…of the season.  There is some good news and bad news regarding the importance of this game.  I’ll start off with the good news.  A win against South Mornington this weekend coupled with a loss for Eley Park against Point Cook could see Box Hill North taking part in the 2010 finals series.  The bad news is that even if Point Cook managed to beat Eley Park by 10 goals we would need to win by around 70 goals, which is something I couldn’t even see Monash doing to Chadstone.  Coming into the home stretch of the season Hoody set the players the task of winning the last four games, something which is 75% of the way to being achieved.  This week’s game will be the biggest challenge of those four, with South Mornington having won more games in the last three months than Richmond, North Brunswick and Chadstone have combined.  The last time the two teams met at Elgar Park a see-sawing battle eventually went the Tiger’s way by the slim margin of seven points.  A similarly inspired performance will be needed here to succeed in that aim of winning the last four, with South Mornington eyeing off a potential finish of third on the ladder and hence the double chance in the finals.  An interesting subplot in this match will be the battle for second on the goalkicking, with Euge and Desi both currently sitting on 17 and hungry for the ‘prize’.  If either of them refuse to pass to other in a scoring position we’ll know why.  Personally I’d find it amusing to see Berlow dob four or five and trump them both.

In a continuation of my recent coverage of the reading out of the teams, I am happy report that Rob ‘Butch/Gagginhood’ Cassidy was back with whiteboard in hand to read out last night’s reserves team.  Those 22 who line up on the weekend have had the challenge put to them - the reserves have an opportunity to finish ninth if they can knock off South Mornington this week.  While that doesn’t sound like much it would mean three wins for the season which would be a improvement on 2009’s two wins, further highlighting the all-round improvement in the club’s fortunes over the last twelve months.  The two Samurai were a welcome addition to the team last week and should be better for the run, especially Masa who until a few nights ago was sleeping on a quarter-inflated lilo on a hardwood floor.  Now that he has something resembling a real bed we can expect him to show us what he is capable of.  The trip down to South Mornington earlier this season yielded a 110-point loss which was more or less par for the course at that stage of the year, however a loss that heavy hasn’t occurred since round 8 so it would be disappointing if this weekend saw a similar result.  Whatever the result, let’s hope the majority are able to make a day/night of it by participating in the quest to be the ‘last man standing’.

Until next week (assuming weeks now last for eight months), this is Turbo saying “I don’t mind you peeing in the shower, but only if you’re taking a shower”.

Round 17 - Box Hill North v Richmond Central

Like all of you I’m refreshed after a week off and am raring to go for this week’s instalment of Turbo’s Friday Preview.  The Volunteers Memorial Cup is once again on the line this week as Box Hill North head down to Kevin Bartlett Reserve to take on fellow D4 stalwarts Richmond Central.  For the second match in a row (I almost wrote second week in a row, but technically that would be false) we take on a side that started the season strongly but has since been besieged by injuries and now sees themselves out of finals contention.  After winning their first three games, Richmond have won just 2 of the last 11 and are currently sitting eighth on the ladder, one game and not much percentage behind us.  This means that a win here will open up a two-game gap on them, but more importantly will keep Box Hill North’s mathematical finals chances alive (although we would be relying on Chadstone to beat Eley Park so those chances may only ever remain mathematical).  It is generally a good contest whenever these two sides meet and this time around should be no exception, as Richmond will be desperate to post their first win at home in more than two months. In the earlier meeting between these two sides Box Hill North overcame a slow start to bang on ten straight goals before half time to run out eventual 27-point victors.  That game was particularly notable for being Mary Gilmore’s first senior game for Box Hill North.  Sorry, what?  Oh that’s right.  It was actually Andrew Stanley’s first senior game for Box Hill North.  My mistake.  

One of the pleasant aspects of Box Hill North’s 2010 season has been headaches at the selection table, a luxury which was not afforded to us in 2009.  This has now seemingly extended to not just the makeup of the teams, but who will actually read them out of a Thursday evening.  It seems that Butch has been dropped (despite the awesome work of his alter-ego Gagginhood) and been replaced by the Pimp.  The jury is out as to whether this has been a good move.  Onto the actual game and the side has a more oriental look than usual with the inclusion of our two Japanese scholarship players Masaya and Ken.  Those who were around last year would remember Masaya slotting straight into the ones for the last three games and more than holding his own.  The depth of the squad this year is such that he will have to settle for running around in the early game this time around.  He is staying with Turbo at the moment, and knowing my record of waking people up (ask the members of last year’s Japan trip) it will be a good start if he actually gets to the game.  Ken is another promising Samurai who put in some very good performances in last year’s Japan Cup.  Richmond currently hold the President’s Cup but it was one of the games Box Hill North reserves have played in the second half of the season which could have gone either way so Richmond won’t be taking this game lightly, especially as a win will be crucial if they wish to hold onto their current position of fifth.

Until next week, this is Turbo saying “Sit perfectly still – only I may dance”.

Round 15 - Box Hill North v North Brunswick

It’s amazing what a difference starting well can make.  For the first time in a while last week Box Hill North got on top early and the end result was a 148-point victory over a struggling Chadstone.  This week’s opponent is North Brunswick who also had an impressive result in round 14, albeit a loss, as they went down to the undefeated Mt Lilydale by just 13 points.  This makes for an interesting tussle as both sides would have taken a lot of confidence out of the previous week’s result.  When these two sides met in round 7 North Brunswick were flying and a 51-point win saw them sitting third on the ladder, however a spate of injuries has resulted in the boys from Allard Park winning just one game since then.  Despite this they are sitting only half a game out of the top five so they will be peachy keen to snap what is currently a three-game losing streak and keep their finals hopes alive.  You would think this will be a hotly contested match considering both teams are still in the finals race and a loss here could all but spell the end of season 2010 for either side.  With so much on the line I’m tipping a great game for spectators, although my callipygous self will be at the MCG watching Collingwood flog Richmond.

A panic set out at Elgar Park last night when everybody realised Butch was not around to read out the reserves side. Perhaps he was resting his voice after his truly awful rendition of ‘Killing In The Name Of’ last Saturday night.  Either way a replacement had to be found, and quickly, otherwise Dan would be reading out the side.  Fortunately Manno stepped up to the plate and handled the task with aplomb, informing us of this week’s team in both an informative and entertaining manner (although I’m not sure how happy ‘Stampy’ was with his efforts).  The boys whose names (well at least their nicknames) were read out have the task ahead of them this week.  As per usual the North Brunswick reserves are having a great season, currently sitting second on the ladder with 12 wins, including a 126-point drubbing of Box Hill North in round 7.  Performances of late have been much improved compared to that stage of the season so a repeat of that margin would be a very disappointing result.  A win would be somewhat miraculous but what a great vibe it would create going into the senior game and then following on to the evening’s festivities at ‘Box Hill North’s Got Talent’.

Until next time, this is Turbo saying “don’t thank me, thank the knife”.

Round 14 - Box Hill North v Chadstone

As silly as it sounds, Box Hill North are still a sneaky chance of finals action despite two losses in the last two games. All that needs to be done is to win all four remaining games and rely on other results going our way.  Easy right?  OK maybe not, but the most winnable of those four games occurs this week as we host Chadstone at Elgar Park.  Some of the worst weather conditions ever seen (bad enough for me to retire from playing in 2010 anyway) prevailed the last time the two sides met, and this resulted in an 84-point win.  There is however no such thing as a sure thing in Division 4 so Chadstone will quite rightly consider themselves a chance to snap a losing streak that currently extends beyond 30 games.  Having never defeated Box Hill North in senior football the odds are stacked against them but stranger things have happened (100-point loss to Eley Park anybody?), so this will be no easy game.  There is more than just keeping the faint finals hopes alive to play for this week as one of Box Hill North’s favourite sons, Cameron Liston, runs out for his 100th game.  As most would know he also maintains this fine website in his spare time so perhaps I haven’t actually written this last little bit at all and he has added it in himself to publicise his achievement.

It is not often that a team which kicked one goal the week before finds itself favourites for its upcoming game, but that anomaly occurs this week to due to that solitary goal being enough to go down by just 10 points as we did in the reserves last week against Mt Lilydale.  Chadstone managed twice as many goals as that but conceded 19 to go down by 121 points.  Despite BHN winning comfortably last time around, it would be fair to say that Chadstone are very much a bogey side so they would be quietly confident of squaring the ledger at one win apiece for 2010.  It will be nice to not play on a ground with more mud than grass this week, so you can be reasonably certain that a score of 1.11 won’t be competitive two weeks in a row.  After three weeks of nearly getting over the line it is time to arrest that trend and chalk up win number two for the season, with some extra motivation coming from the fact that a win here will almost certainly consign Chadstone to the wooden spoon and ensure we don’t take that unwanted utensil two years in a row.  Speaking of two in a row, I must for the second week in a row close with an apology, this time to Butch.  I tried as hard as I could but I just couldn’t slot your word of the week, nuclear, into this week’s preview.  Oh wait, I just did.

Until next week, this is Turbo saying “I used to be with it, but then they changed what ‘it’ was. Now, what I'm with isn't it, and what's ‘it’ seems weird and scary to me.”

Round 13 - Box Hill North v Mt Lilydale

After last week’s insipid performance against a determined Eley Park it would be great to have a nice, easy game to follow up with this week.  Alas that is not to be as Box Hill North will this week travel out to banshee country to take on ladder leaders Mt Lilydale.  Yet to be defeated in 2010, Mt Lilydale have taken all before them so far this year, and after last week’s scoreline at Whitehorse Reserve coupled with the week of rest they had due to the bye they will be supremely confident of maintaining their unbeaten streak.  It seems that last time we met I underestimated the literacy levels of the Mt Lilydale side, and some of what was written in that week’s preview was used as ammunition.  I will make no such mistake this time!  Considering they have at least doubled their opponent’s score in every home game this season bar the nailbiter against Monash, I don’t think I could pick a hole in their form even if I wanted to.  As tends to happen after a heavy loss, there have been a few changes made at a selection table so hopefully that has sent a message to the playing group that a performance similar to last week won’t be tolerated, especially considering another triple-figure margin would be the most likely result.  I think we can all agree nobody wants that, apart from our opponents of course.

An interesting matchup awaits in the reserves this week.  Box Hill are coming off two narrow losses whilst Mt Lilydale won their most recent game but only managed to score two goals after quarter time.  This may have had as much to do with the state of the Mt Lilydale oval as anything else, which by all reports is not exactly in pristine condition at the moment.  You could say the same about last week’s venue so a similarly heavy  track might not be such a bad thing in the context of our chances of victory, especially when you consider there aren’t too many in this week’s side who move gracefully across the field (as an antelope would).  After being a close-run thing for three quarters the last time these two sides met saw Mt Lilydale victorious by 50 points after kicking nine goals to three in the final quarter, something which will need to be avoided if this game is going to have a result different to that one (and the last couple of games against Richmond and Eley Park as well).  Whilst the margin in last week’s early game was far smaller than that of the later game, the disappointment was about the same seeing as for the second week in a row a game that was there to be won ended up being lost.  Perhaps this week could be third time lucky?  Just to close I’d like to apologise to Doodles, who I promised a better effort than last week’s preview which he felt did not give him as many chuckles as previous pieces.  I’m not sure I’ve delivered on that promise.

Until next week, this is Turbo saying “she’s touching my special area.”

Round 12 - Box Hill North v Eley Park

First of all I must apologise for the lateness of this week’s Turbo’s Friday Preview.  For the first time in I can’t remember how long I was busy at work and hence I couldn’t spend half my morning putting this piece together like I usually do.  Not to worry, the quality shouldn’t be diminished much considering how low a base it’s coming from.  After an inspired victory against Richmond last week, we are sitting just a game (and significant percentage) outside the top five so a win in the local derby versus Eley Park, who are one of three teams currently sitting on five wins, would see us right in the mix for the finals.  Eley Park are coming off a tough couple of games having been defeated by the top two sides in the last two weeks so they will be looking forward to the opportunity for an easier game, at least on paper.  However anybody who has watched a game between this week’s combatants will know that it is never an easy game when Box Hill North and Eley Park meet.  These matches have a knack for being close, and with just four points separating the two teams on the ladder, this one is bound to be another tight result.  Will a Dan Penny shot after the siren yet again determine the winner?  Possibly, so let’s hope Eley Park’s president doesn’t fulfill his promise to hide a sniper in the cemetery on the other side of train tracks…

When Dan got up to read out the reserves team last night, a rousing chorus of boos went around the Elgar Park clubrooms followed by a passionate chant of “Butch, Butch, Butch”.  Clearly the masses had spoken and Rob, the close-checking defender in the mould of ‘Spud’ Frawley, took to the stage to read out the side for this week’s game.  Last week’s seniors victory combined with a relatively clean bill of health from the game meant that most of the senior regulars who were dropped to find a bit of form have been unable to break back into the senior side just yet, and will once again take their place in the early game.  After holding a lead against Richmond the reserves weren’t quite able to get over the line, so those guys will be keen to atone for that this week and once again stake their claim for senior selection.  The one and only Heath makes his return from injury this week, and if he doesn’t do his hammy in the warm up again he should provide good support in the pursuit of victory.  Eley Park have won the last four reserves clashes by an average of 55 points so they will be confident of making it five in a row.  A consistent performance across all four quarters will be needed to halt the streak and chalk win number two for 2010.

Until next week, this is Turbo saying “I said I don’t want any damn vegetables”.

Round 11 - Box Hill North v Richmond Central

The finals aspirations of Box Hill North have been dented after last week’s disappointing loss to Manningham (our eighth loss in eight attempts at Koonung), however the gap between fifth and ninth is still small enough that a win this week against Richmond Central will put us right back in contention.  Richmond suffered a surprise loss last week to the other black with yellow sash guernsey-wearing team in South Mornington, a result which has made their spot in the top five the shakiest it has been all season.  The Snakes will be confident of getting back on the winner’s list having not lost at Elgar Park since 2006, so it will take a more switched on unit than the one which took the field against the Cobras last week to make their hold on a top five spot even more tenuous while at the same time restoring our hopes for September action.  Last year’s fixture at Elgar Park, which saw Richmond come out on top by 69 points, was something of a shootout with 42 goals being scored and the game being one of only five times Box Hill North scored over 100 points 2009.  The forecast for Saturday suggests this won’t be another shootout, perhaps more like the game in 2008 when a Dan Penny shot after siren went wide resulting in a heartbreaking 2-point loss.  Hopefully this week’s game will be similarly exciting albeit with a different result.

Imagine the horror on the faces of the Box Hill North bretheren when the reserves team was read out for this week’s game.  First, the name Peter Kotsaridis was not read out for his annual appearance against Richmond. Suffice to say we were devastated (or devvo as the kids say these days).  Second, and even more upsetting, named on the half-back flank was “Bennett”.  Now there is only one man at Box Hill North named Bennett, and that is favourite son Frosty.  Was the man with the cane coming out of forced retirement for one last game?  No.  Much to everyone’s relief it turns the name was just misread and it was actually Burnett (the natural backman who didn’t originally tell anyone he was a backman) named on the half-back flank.  Some other interesting names appear on the teamsheet for this game due to the axe being wielded after the senior game last week, including one who kicked 14 the last time he played in the twos against the Snakes.  He has been named at full back for this game so we are unlikely to see the same heroics this time around.  I won’t name who it is because I hear the man given task of telling him he has been dropped is actually yet to do so.  All in all the changes that have been made should hopefully ensure this is a competitive game despite it being a clash between a team with six wins and a team with just one.

Until next week, this is Turbo saying “shut up, that’s why”.

Round 10 - Box Hill North v Manningham Cobras

After a week off for the Queen’s Birthday Weekend (still can’t believe the Pies drew with those hacks from Melbourne) you would think that I’d have twice as much material as normal for this week’s edition of Turbo’s Friday Preview.  Unfortunately this is not the case but rest assured this week’s piece will still be of the usual high standard you have come to expect over the last couple of years.  The second half of the home away season kicks off with a crunch game against local nemesis Manningham Cobras, who like us started the season slowly but have started to hit their straps the last couple of weeks.  Both sides have seen an influx of new players in 2010, so it may have just taken both sides a while to gel.  The two clashes between these sides last year were split one apiece, a comfortable win at home in round 17 going some way to ease the pain of losing on the siren at Koonung earlier in the season after going in five goals up at three-quarter time.  One of the stars of that round 17 win, yours truly (who dobbed a lazy five goals, most of them cherry picked), will be missing this week due to a groin injury.  Somewhat surprisingly this injury appears to be due to over-use rather than under-use.  It may surprise some of you to read that despite a 5-match losing streak earlier in the season, our last two wins over Swinburne and Chadstone see us sitting just four points shy of the top five.  A win this week, coupled with other results going our way, could see us out of the five merely on percentage.  The Cobras are in the exact same boat so this could be a season-defining game for both sides, providing a possible springboard towards September for the victor.

This year’s maiden reserves victory last start over Chadstone gave no less than 13 players the chance to sing the club song for the first time.  I wonder how many of them knew the words?  After getting that taste for victory I’m sure they will be hoping for another opportunity to brush up on the lyrics after this week’s game.  The heavy recruiting of the Cobras has seen a rise in depth (if you get what I mean) which has resulted in their reserves team having already won more games than they did in 2009.  They are right in finals contention so will see this game as a good opportunity to consolidate their position in the top half of the ladder.  .  There is an interesting sub-plot surrounding this game.  Feel free to correct me but I believe that this game will, for the first time in the history between these two clubs, feature players who once upon a time played for one club but are now with the other.  I will be very interested to see whether this has any impact on proceedings, although I’m sure that once the ball is thrown up for the first it will be 22 on 22 with little attention given to who came from where.  Like the seniors both sides snatched a win off each other last year, the difference being that the away team was the winner of both reserves games.  Let’s hope the trend continues this time around.

Until next week, this is Turbo saying “we’re too old to start having children; if you’re looking for something to do why don’t you start a new twine ball”.

Round 9 - Box Hill North v Chadstone

It feels nice to be back on the winners list doesn’t it!  After five consecutive losses we finally got a chance to sing the song after a high-scoring win over Swinburne.  One of the most impressive aspects of the win was our accuracy in front of goals, with the game representing the first time since joining the VAFA in 2002 that Box Hill North have kicked more than 20 goals while also kicking fewer than 10 behinds in the same game.  An excellent chance presents itself for a second consecutive win with this week’s game seeing us face Chadstone, who have never beaten Box Hill North.  Despite sitting last on the ladder, winless and with a percentage under 25, they have pushed some of their opponents this year (most notably Swinburne, our opponents from last week) so a win is no certainty.  Make no mistake, the team formerly known as Syndal Tally Ho will probably see this as their best chance for a win this year so they will be going all out to ensure that the result won’t be known until the final siren.  Last week’s win occurred because it was a four quarter performance, our first for 2010.  That will again be required this week.  Something to look out for in this game will be Leon attempting to surpass the hanger he took last week which, if you saw the DVD of the game, probably won’t be all that difficult.  Come on Desi, give us something we can send in to The Footy Show.

The reserves are still searching for win number one in 2010, and will be desperately keen to do so in this week’s game against Chadstone.  This is a genuine cellar-dweller contest with both sides currently winless in 2010, and our percentage of just 34.3% is incredibly enough to slightly shade theirs (29.6%).  Chadstone will go into this game with some degree of confidence (well as much as a team without a win and a percentage under 30 can) considering previous meetings between the two sides have largely gone their way, with two wins in 2008 being our only successes against them in the early game.  Despite kicking a respectable 10 goals last week we managed to concede 32 (including 11 in the first quarter) which will rarely win you a game of football, so increased accountability will definitely be required if this result is to go our way.  Losing Berlow (I won’t use his new nickname, this is a family-friendly website) to the seniors hurts our chances but there have been some very handy inclusions.  Both teams need a win to restore some pride and will see this as a prime opportunity to do so, so this should be a cracker of a contest in which the side wanting it that little bit more will come out on top.

Until next week, this is Turbo saying “the waiting game sucks, let’s play Hungry Hungry Hippos”.

Round 8 - Box Hill North v Swinburne Uni

After a reasonably positive start to 2010, the last three weeks have yielded three losses with a combined margin of 216 points.  It just so happens that the teams currently sitting 1,2 and 3 on the ladder have been our opponents the last three weeks.  This week’s opponent Swinburne started the season strongly but have hit a bit of a form slump of late, dropping their last two games after having the bye in round 4.  Having not tasted victory since the first day of this month Swinburne will be very keen to get back on the winner’s list and will see this week as an opportunity to do so.  The big question is perhaps who will kick their goals as the leading goalkicker in D4 from last year in Atila Yaman has moved on, much to Kaine’s delight.  They are currently averaging 11 less points per game than they did last year so his loss has been felt but probably not significantly enough to suggest they are any weaker than they were last year.  Not having such a dominant focal point may even actually play in their favour as there is now plenty of unpredictability with regards to who will kick their goals, with 9 players averaging at least a goal per game this season.  An unknown factor in this game will be the presence of the VAFA clash jumper, with the league determining that Swinburne as the away side will be donning the official alternative strip.  Will this have any effect on the result?  Probably not, but I was struggling with the closing statement for this paragraph.
 
After yet another demoralising loss to North Brunswick (the last three losses to them have been by greater than 120 points), the reserves find themselves in an unfamiliar situation this week – the last time this week’s combatants met Box Hill North came out on top, beating Swinburne by 28 points.  That stat might make you all warm and fuzzy but I must spoil it slightly by reminding that 10 of our 12 goals came in the form of five goals each to Chris Langley (who would kick 100 goals if he played in the reserves every week) and Shaun Irvine (remember him?).  Coupled with the fact that Swinburne reserves have already won more games than they did last year tells you that this game will be no walk in the (Elgar) park.  We could possibly break the record for most water carriers this week, with the number of names on the extended bench being longer than my…arm.  Remember to get there early if you guys want a game!  Like most weeks we will see yet more debutants in this game, bringing the number of players to have represented Box Hill North in the early game in 2010 very close to the 50 mark.  One of those 50 is the Pimp himself Tony Manno, who despite various reports has not popped any questions in recent times.

Until next week, this is Turbo saying “you see this tux? I got it cheap cause Roy Cohn died in it.  That fancy yacht? A bargain cause it smells like cat pee.  And those beautiful women? They used to be men.”

Round 7 - Box Hill North v North Brunswick

Hello and welcome to another edition of Turbo’s Friday Preview.  I was quite humbled earlier this week to discover that my readership now extends much further than just the Box Hill North community.  Seeing as my column is so popular that people from opposition clubs are checking it out, does a career at the Herald Sun beckon?  Why not, I’m clearly a better writer than Mark Robinson (not that that would be all that difficult).  But enough about me.  There is no such thing as an easy game in Division 4 and another tough encounter awaits this week as we travel to the recently re-furbished Allard Park to take on North Brunswick, who are coming off a big win against Chadstone last week and are seeking their fourth win on the trot.  North Brunswick pulled one of the coups off the off-season with the poaching of Christian Stagliano, coach of D2’s Banyule, to take the reins in 2010.  Amazingly he has since been poached again, this time by Collingwood to take on a role with their VFL team.  While it is not ideal to lose your coach mid-season, his replacement has stepped right in to fill the breach and they are yet to lose under his tutelage.  A four-quarter performance will undoubtedly be required if we are to be the team to inflict his first loss as senior coach.  Just like the last couple of weeks, it will take more than just patches of good footy to post a competitive score.

Last week’s reserves match was really a game of two halves.  Going in a point up at half time, we were only able to put another four goals on the scoreboard whilst conceding 12 to go down by 50 points.  Like last week’s opposition, North Brunswick also have a few names lining up in their reserves who have been quality senior players for a number of years but are now giving the younger guys a go.  Names like Twaddle (who kicked 13 against Chadstone last week), Freeman, Robertson, Boudoloh and Sammartino should be familiar to those who have been around a few years. Those gentlemen have more or less been automatic selections in the North Brunswick senior side over the last few years, so it is clear that the showing that was put up in the second half last week will be nowhere near enough to get the job done this time around.  Play like we did in the first half and there is an opportunity to put the first win on the board for 2010.  Turbo’s first piece of recruiting since bringing Crazy down in 2004 will see two new faces make their Box Hill North debuts in this game.  Let’s make them feel welcome, and if they are any good, give me the credit.

Until next week, this is Turbo saying “who needs money when we’ve got feathers”.

Round 6 - Box Hill North v Mt Lilydale

All Rhodes lead to Elgar Park this week (see what I did there?), where Box Hill North for the second time in a row will host a yet-to-be-defeated side, this time the ‘country folk’ from Mt Lilydale.  After some very convincing victories in the first four rounds Mt Lilydale hit a bit of a bump last week, needing all four quarters to get over the line against an up-and-coming Point Cook side.  Perhaps some of their players had never been to that side of the big smoke before and stopped on the way for a look at all the tall buildings, losing track of time and hence missing the game?  Probably not, but hey you never know.  What that result says though  is that the Rams are not quite the same force away that they are at home.  This is backed up by last year’s results, where we went down to them by 30 points in round 1 at home, but were spanked to the tune of 81 points in round 13 up in the hills.  Having never beaten Mt Lilydale before, you could tell at training this week that the guys who have been around for a few years want nothing more than to break that drought.  I’m tipping that it won’t take long for the new guys to realise why we want to beat Mt Lilydale so badly.  Amongst these new guys is Dave Summerfield, who returns for his first game since round 2.  A pretty handy footballer is Dave, and also a pretty good bloke (despite the fact he is a Carlton supporter).
 
It was back to the bad old days for the reserves last week, the 195-point loss being larger than any margin suffered in the last six years.  It probably said more about the opposition though, as the performance and effort was arguably an improvement on the week before.  Regardless however it was still an unacceptable result and any doubts about how the coaches felt about it were erased about 5 minutes into Tuesday’s training session.   This week presents an opportunity to post the first victory of 2010 with Mt Lilydale going down by 20 points to Point Cook last week, the same Point Cook who defeated us by the barest of margins three weeks prior.   Opportunity doesn’t mean certainty however, and looking at Mt Lilydale’s team list from the last couple of weeks shows the names of former seniors mainstays Pat Carolan and Chris Gibson who despite their advanced age would still be very dangerous opponents for any reserves team.  A few spots needed filling this week with the smallest player, the most tattooed player and the most pale player from last week all going up for their first senior game in 2010 this week.  Fortunately the depth we didn’t have the last couple of years has kicked in and some exciting new talent will be making their Box Hill North debuts, assuming Kotsa can find some socks for them.
 
Until next week, this is Turbo saying “think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy thoughts”.

Round 5 - Box Hill North v Monash Gryphons

Despite losing last week to South Mornington there were some positives to come out of the game.  The biggest positive was that WE DON’T HAVE TO GO TO SOUTH MORNINGTON AGAIN THIS YEAR.  There were some others but that is the one most worth mentioning.  We are back at home this week, and the challenge that awaits is probably the biggest so far of 2010.  Monash Gryphons were the only team relegated from D3 and they could probably consider themselves unlucky for the fact they won six games for the season, something that three teams (Box Hill North included) couldn’t manage to do in D4 last year.  As expected they have started their stint in the newly-named Division 4 very well and are yet to drop a game.  After two reasonably comfortable wins before playing the bye in round 3 the Gryphons blew Point Cook away to the tune of 133 points last week, so there is no doubt this will be a tough game made all the tougher for a couple of key outs through injury.  On the plus side we also have some key ins, including Screech who isn’t attending any music festivals this weekend.  After travelling to the far reaches of metropolitan Melbourne and beyond in the last couple of weeks, the comfort of home will be welcomed in our quest to be the first to knock off the side coached by former Fitzroy superstar Richard Osborne, who incidentally I will be trying to get the autograph of on my Mother’s Day Card (mum was a big Fitzroy fan back in the day when they still existed).
 
After a couple of close losses in the first two games, the reserves were on the receiving end of our first (and hopefully last) belting of 2010, scoring just one goal in a 110-point loss to South Mornington.  Unfortunately for the twos the man who kicked that goal has benefited from a dearth of crumbing forwards in the seniors and earnt himself a promotion, so we will need to find some new avenues to goal.  With the lack of Irishmen in the side this week, the best form of attack might be a tight defensive effort.  This will be helped with the inclusion of the man who has seemingly scored the job of reading out the reserves team on a Thursday night.  Of course I’m talking about Rob Cassidy,  who can have zero possessions yet still have a good game such is his ability to restrict his opponent to the minimum possible output.  If everyone sticks on their man as tightly as Rob does there is a chance that this game could be a nil-all draw, which would no doubt be an ugly game but much more desirable than another 18-goal loss.
 
Until next week, this is Turbo saying “it’s times like these I’m glad I flunked out of that Mexican med school”.

Round 4 - Box Hill North v South Mornington

Maybe one year we will avoid the road trip to South Mornington.  Unfortunately 2010 is not the year as this week sees us make the trek down to what in theory is a pleasant beachside suburb but in reality is a cold, dark pocket of inclemency in which the best road is the one that takes you home.  Seriously, the Bureau have forecast a sunny 22-degree day tomorrow but in all likelihood Citation Reserve will be bathed in fog and the mercury will struggle to get to double figures.  Our last trip there was even more spoiled by the result, a  148-point loss which was always on the cards once we were down to 19 men ten minutes into the first quarter.  The return game later in the season at Elgar Park was much closer with the margin a mere seven points, so the gap between the two sides clearly closed somewhat as the season progressed.  While the last two weeks have seen some encouraging signs the opposition we have faced so far are probably not finals calibre just yet, so this week will be a good test against a side which is now into its fourth year of VAFA football and as such would be keen to build on their solitary finals appearance from last year.  Four-quarter performances in the first two games would have seen us with two comfortable wins, and there is no doubt that this is what will be required to get the four points this time around and send an early message to Division 4 that we are not just looking to make up the numbers in 2010.
 
The reserves will be very keen to atone for last week’s heartbreaking one-point loss to Point Cook by taking it right up to South Mornington this week.  This will be tough as South Mornington at home are a very different proposition to when they have to travel.  Evidence of this is the results from last year’s games, which were  very similar to that of the seniors – a 158-point smashing away followed by a 5-point thriller at home (both losses).  So far in 2010 the Tigers have played once at home for a 12-point win and twice away for 82-point and 43-point losses, so they will be pleased to be back on their home turf and will be keen to fully utilise their home ground advantage.  We will need to avoid the final quarter fadeouts that have characterized our first two games this season if we are any hope of registering our first win for 2010.  Presti will certainly be hoping that if there is a breeze tomorrow when he is kicking out from full back that it won’t be as strong or blowing in the same direction as the one at Point Cook, although as previously mentioned Citation Reserve has a knack for sitting right in the middle of some awful weather so he probably shouldn’t get his hopes up.
 
Until next week, this is Turbo saying “I’ve been called ugly, pug ugly, fugly, pug fugly – but never ugly ugly”.
 
Round 3 - Box Hill North v Point Cook

A Dan Penny goal after the siren to beat Eley Park.  Yawn, it’s been done.  Still, good to start off 2010 with a win! Onto this week, where we face VAFA newcomers Point Cook who have yet to register a win as a senior club and hence will be very keen to assert some home ground muscle in front of what from all reports will be a very strong crowd.  Having never played them before it is difficult to say how the match may pan out, so I will spend most of this paragraph discussing geography.  The way people have been carrying on you’d think Point Cook was a suburb of Ballarat, however it is in fact no further away than Werribee (which is in itself a decent distance away but not an expedition).  That said, don’t be surprised if Stifler and/or new trainer Luke actually end up in Ballarat after their infamous trip to Rosebud via Mt Baw Baw a couple of years ago.  Despite that mishap the prize for most catastrophic wrong turn now sits with  Tuba and Coon after they missed the turnoff to Coldstream when making their way to our pre-season camp a couple of weeks ago and ended up in Yea.  Anyway, back to the game.  We don’t want to wait until after the final siren to win the game so a good start here is crucial, especially seeing as Point Cook’s round 1 game against Richmond saw them start off well before fading, much like Eley Park did against us this week.  However I’m sure if it does come down to the last kick again and the ball is in Dan’s hands, we will be singing the song for the second week in a row.
 
Another tough week for selection in the reserves with a number of players missing out.  On the plus side this means those who missed out the week before will get their opportunity to show their wares on the expanses of Boardwalk Reserve.  A four-quarter performance is crucial here, as last week’s result may have been different if not for a final quarter fadeout which was pretty much a reverse of what happened in the later game.  Like their senior counterparts Point Cook’s seconds are yet to win a game in the VAFA, the closest they’ve gotten being a 62-point loss against Richmond in round 1.  Coupled with last week’s 74-point loss to Swinburne you would think this would be an easy game.  Bear in mind though that the Eley Park which won last week lost the week before to that same Swinburne outfit, and by a greater margin.  If the output of the first three quarters from last week can be replicated for four quarters this time around, Box Hill North reserves are a fair chance to get off the mark for 2010.
 
Until next week, this is Turbo saying “can’t…lift…arm…or…speak…at…normal…rate”.

Round 2 - Box Hill North v Eley Park

Finally.  After what seems like (and probably was) the longest pre-season in history, Box Hill North will tomorrow play its first game for 2010 at home against local rival Eley Park.  In what is surely a very rare occurrence we play them not having played any other teams since the last meeting between the two sides, due to that match occurring in the final round of 2009.  That particular encounter was a disappointing way to end a disappointing season, with the margin being 47 points in favour of the Sharks.  Perhaps the only memorable moment of that clash was a sickening collision between Turbo and Nuggets in which the latter surprisingly came off second best.  After another near-miss at training last night, the two have come to an agreement to stay within their respective arcs tomorrow.  This game will see six new players to the club make their senior debuts, the majority of whom have played quality football at higher levels.  With a virtually empty injury list this will possibly be the best Box Hill North side on paper in Mark Hood’s time at the helm.  Recent form however has been with Eley Park who convincingly won both games in 2009, so the 22 who take the field will need to be at their best to come away with the points.

Something very weird happened when the reserves side was read out last night.  There were more than 22 players to choose from!  For those who were around last year, we know this is a far cry from 2009 when reserves coach John Gallagher generally needed to call on a mix of Supers, mates and occasionally even himself to field a full side.  Hopefully the strength of numbers we have at the moment can be maintained such that the same isn’t required at any stage this year (especially the last one).  A real positive of the last few weeks has been the number of people consistently turning up to training, giving the players who will take their place in this side not just the opportunity to hone their skills but also to learn a bit about what their teammates are good and maybe not so good at.  Reserves footy can often be as much about cohesion as it can be about ability, so we can go into this game confident that performances in 2010 will exceed those in 2009.  How nice would it be to start the season off in the best possible way with a win?  The answer is pretty nice, or any similar answer you can think of.

Until next week, this is Turbo saying “I was saving sugar for my wedding night”.

Turbo's Friday Preview 2009 Archive

Turbo's Friday Preview 2008 Archive